Invisible
by gracie89
Summary: Oneshot I think. Tony bumps into an old teacher at a crime scene and she remembers something he thought no-one knew. Contains references to child abuse.
1. Chapter 1

He realised he had know her the second he saw her. He couldn't place her though until he heard her name: Mrs Bea Burley. She was a tiny woman, less than 5ft tall and maybe 80 years old. She was dressed in that way that people of her generation and class always seemed to be; like they were perpetually wearing in their Sunday best.

She was a little stooped making her seem even smaller. Her white hair had been perfectly set; he remembered it when it had still been golden brown though with the first sprinklings of grey. She seemed so very old compared to that distant memory. Her eyes though, they were still as kind and warm as ever. The day's events had obviously taken their toll though.

She had witnessed a murder take place and had seen the killers face. They were still at the crime scene and he was supposed to be taking photos while McGee interviewed her.

"McGee!" he called, "Let me do the interview."

"What? Why?" McGee asked suspiciously, trying to figure out what kind of prank this could possibly be leading to.

"Because I know her."

"Really?" McGee asked his voice filled with mistrust and doubt still. "How could you possible her, she must be in her eighties."

"She was my teacher, in oh when was it? Third or fourth grade maybe? And why am I not allowed to know eighty year olds?"

"You know what if she remembers you, fine. But if you're lying to me..."

"Lying? Why on earth would I lie to you about this?" he asked innocently, this did not help his case.

"Why do you lie about anything?"

"Fair enough, but just because she doesn't remember me does not prove anything, this was a long time ago and she must have had thousands of kids go through her class. You can't expect her to remember all of them."

He needed have worried, the second he introduced himself she knew who he was.

"Hi I'm Special Agent Anthony DiNozzo and this is..."

"Tony! Is that you!" she laughed. "Oh I s'pose you don't remember an old girl like me but I..."

"Were my third grade teacher! Of course I remember you." Tony interrupted beaming.

"Well, look at you all grown up! I'm so glad you've done so well for yourself. Well I certainly feel a lot better than I did. Seeing that man... well..." she looked much more shaken again as she thought back to the events she had witness causing her to shiver. Tony immediately whipped off his jacket and placed it over the woman's shoulders.

"How 'bout I take you back to the office, you'll feel much better there." Tony said warmly.

"Still such a lovely boy, why thank you, it would be good to get away from here."

McGee just stood bemused watching the two interact. Well, looks like Tony wasn't pulling his leg for once.

XXXXX

When they got back to the NCIS building, Tony found himself in an interview room with Mrs Burley as none of the less formal conference rooms were available and it was too noisy for her Hearing Aids in the office she told Tony after a few minutes of confusion and repetition.

Tony made it clear she was not a suspect and that she should not feel intimidated. She simply laughed and said if she was easily intimidated she would have lasted 5 minutes with some of the hellion masquerading as third graders.

Both Ziva and McGee had snuck in to watch the interview through sheer curiosity, well, that and the possibility of dirt on Tony. They were both way to excited at the prospect. They were not expecting what they were to hear at all. They both felt very guilty at the intrusion afterwards.

It was not until after Tony had wrapped up the official part of the interview that things got 'interesting'. It happened just as Tony got up to leave in fact.

"Well thanks for everything, you did great. We'll have the guy caught in no time. So I'm gonna have you talk to a sketch artist to get a good picture of the guy, okay?"

"I'm so sorry." She blurted suddenly as he made it to the door.

"What do you mean? Sorry about what? Honestly, you did great, one of the best eye witnesses I've had in a while actually." He said sitting back down as he presumed she had more to add.

She tilted her head making eye contact and gentle grasping his hand.

"You know what I'm talking about. Back when you were a little boy."

"When I was a kid? What do you mean? You were a great teacher. We all loved you..." Tony said looking a little confused but smiled brightly anyway. She saw through it, just like she always had.

"Oh honey," she shook her head sadly, "I'm sorry because... because I _knew_."

"Well, apparently you're the only one because I honestly have no idea _what_ you're talking about." He joked but not unkindly. "Mind you I was only eight at the time, what did you do? Give me a bad report? Kill the class pet?"

"Ha, there's the Tony I remember, never could stop joking around," she said fondly, "And no; my conscience is clean on the class pet front by the way."

They both laughed. Then her face fell again, mirth forgotten as the guilt sunk its teeth in once again. Her eyes were suddenly watering and she felt her lip quiver uncontrollably. She pulled a handkerchief out her bag looking embarrassed.

"Oh look at me! You must think I'm some nutty old bat."

"Not at all." Tony said comfortingly squeezing her hand. She squeezed his back with surprising intensity and leaned in closer to him.

"Oh Tony, you're such a lovely boy... I just don't think I can apologise enough. I knew what was going on and I did _nothing_. I just... when I spoke to him he was so charming I didn't want to believe it."

Tony involuntarily flinched back, a haunted look flashed over his face before he could stop it. He knew what she was talking all along about but something in her voice had hit him harder than he expected, and with it a came memory, a bad one. He heard her let out a tiny sob at his reaction. He wanted to reassure her but he couldn't look her in the eye anymore so instead he stared at the table; looking intently at in her hands in his. He could feel the soft tremors that ran through them. They looked so small next to his, so frail, her joints swollen with age but still nimble when the occasion demanded it. Her skin soft was as silk and seemed just as delicate.

"You don't have to apologise I was fine, I _am_ fine." He said finally looking her in the face again, mask on, wide smile resurrected.

"Well we both know I have plenty to be sorry about. I could have done something, I _should_ have done something."

"Everything was fine, honestly. I don't know what you think was happening but you're wrong." He said, smile rigid on his face still.

"I knew the signs," she said as though he hadn't said a word, "I knew them well. If you work with kids as long as I have you're bound to, I suppose. After you... after you I never let my intuition go ignored in these matters. See I knew the first time I met you."

Tony stayed silent, unable to trust his voice.

"I was saying hello to all my students like I do every year," she said her voice far off and wistful like she was caught in the memory, "every child individually, just for a quick chat. Any you, were just so full of beans, so excited and dead set on making me laugh."

Her eyes glistened as she remembered him then and allowed herself a little chuckle. Then that smile disappeared again and Tony missed it straight away, his grin falling with hers.

"Then I asked you about your Daddy. Course, we'd been told about your mama so I knew better than to bring her up. I thought it'd be okay to ask about him though, but the second I asked, you got this look on your face and I just knew. You whipped your head around to check he wasn't there and the relief when you realised he wasn't... well, that said it all.

"On your quiet days I always knew it was him you were thinking of, your expression whenever you thought about him, it changed. I can't even describe it exactly, but I'd know it anywhere. When you came in with your arm in a cast I thought, 'this is it; I'm going to do something'. When I asked you what happen you didn't even lie, you just shrugged and ran off to play.

"So I called your daddy to come in and see me. I thought he would be some monster, but he was so charming I thought I must be going crazy. I couldn't even ask him about it because he was so friendly and seemed so... nice. But then I saw him a few weeks later at that principals meeting, you know after you pulled that little stunt in assembly."

Tony let a full on laugh at that memory.

"Yes, you certainly were a... _creative_ child. But afterwards, as you were leaving when he didn't know I could see him he grabbed you so hard and shook you," another gentle sob escaped despite her best efforts, "Oh and the look on your face! This look of just... terror, terror and pain but you didn't let out a peep. Not a single sound.

"I didn't want it to be true, because I had dismissed it before, and I didn't want to think I could have let that go on... so I just told myself it wasn't happening. Oh I'm such a terrible person, how could I have done that to you! I used to know when you sat so _rigidly_ and said you felt ill in gym class even though normally when you were really sick you would plead to join in. Or when you came in with bruises you couldn't hide and you're stories were so_ flat_. Normally when you told a story, and you told a _lot_ of stories, they were filled with enthusiasm, excitement and a hefty dose of embellishment.

"Oh, and the way you never wanted to go home. Any excuse to stay on and you were there. I could see all these signs, so clearly and I did nothing. I know you were lying about everything being fine. We both know it... but thank you. Thank you for trying to make me feel better even though I don't deserve it for a second."

Tony stood up and for a moment she thought he was going to leave, but instead he walked around the table sat on the chair next to the tiny old lady. Wordlessly he put a hand on her shoulder before pulling her into a hug. Clinging on tightly she felt her emotions overwhelm her once again and she let herself cry uninhibitedly. He just soothed her gently his face absolutely void of emotion as he stared numbly at the wall beyond the weeping woman.

"Oh DiNozzo." Gibbs said to himself from the other side of the glass. He had come in half way through the interview to find Ziva and McGee gawking. Once he realised why he had sent them out in a somewhat... _threatening_ tone of voice and off they had run tails between their legs.

Having met Tony's father he knew what she had meant about him being charming, only his skilled eyes had seen through the man. He had however chosen not to bridge the subject with Tony because he knew the younger man did not want to talk about. He thought it was something to do with not wanting to seem weak or to disappoint him somehow. Not that he would have been of course, it was not Tony's fault what had happen and it certainly wasn't a reflection on his character.

He hoped that one day Tony felt he could tell him about his father and not be ashamed but until that day came he would let Tony keep his secret. And so he just stood there, heart breaking just a little.

XXXXX

When Gibbs came up to the bullpen he gave a quiet but deadly warning that they were not to bring up anything they had heard unless Tony did first. They two agent just exchanged a guilty look and nodded.

None of them told what they had heard to Tony but one look at their faces and he knew.

"So how 'bout a drink then?" Tony asked as they packed up to leave after a couple hours of practically silent work in the bullpen. His voice was subdued and the clearly tinged with sadness.

"I think that would be a good idea." Ziva replied.

"Me too, I'll call Abby, see if she up to it." McGee added with a small smile aimed at Tony.

Tony smiled back, not a real smile but close enough.

Things were going to be okay. He was okay now. He had comforted Mrs Burley until she had calmed down and he had thanked her. She had looked surprised and confused. What could he possibly be thankful for?

He had simply smiled and told her, "You saw me."


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Okay, I wasn't going to continue but you guys gave such a nice response I decided to do another chapter. This is also a pre-series one-shot and not strictly linked to the other but it does follow broadly similar themes. This time it is an old partner that **_**see's**_** Tony. Hope this doesn't disappoint. **

I've always said one day he'll go too far. That he'll push too hard and get himself killed. And as I watch him as he once again finds himself on the wrong end of a pistol, I wonder if today is the day.

It started this morning when we caught a suspect in our latest case. We all knew the guy was guilty; it had been written all over his face and laced in every word he spoke. We _knew_ he was guilty but we couldn't prove it; I knew it, Tony knew it and he knew it. He could have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for Tony.

Tony had seen a crack, seen a way in; it was tiny and almost unnoticeable but that was all he had needed. So Tony had done what Tony did best, he had charmed him, lulled him into a false sense of security and then he had struck. Winding him up, needling him, twisting him up in his own words; wrapping them around him until he choked.

Tony likes to play the 'dumb card' but the kid's as sharp as a knife. Everyone underestimates him. He can become anyone. When he was undercover last it was hard to even recognise him; like he had simply loaned his face out to someone else. It was disconcerting, so disconcerting I often wonder if I know him at all; I'd like to think I do but maybe I'm being naive.

The thing I find most odd about him though, is the fact that even though he could fit in anywhere he wanted to, around the precinct he just... clashes. He pisses people off, he winds them up and he goofs off, then out of nowhere he comes out with ideas even the veteran cops hadn't thought of and they resent him for it. And he's reckless too; not with other people safety of course, no he is reckless with his own safety. Other guys in the squad think he's overconfident, like he thinks he's invincible but that isn't it at all. It's something else entirely; it's almost as if his own health is somehow inconsequential in comparison to everyone else's.

If he wanted to he could get away with it all and yet... he doesn't even try. It would be so easy for him but he_ won't_; it's as if he wants people to punish him. He has this odd contradiction within himself; he wants to be liked but he _needs_ to feel loathed, like it's some kind of safety blanket. I wonder whose past actions he is trying to justify; I figure it's a parent but I hope I'm wrong.

People read his finely coiffed hair and expensive suits as the mark of a narcissist but really it was just the mask he showed the world. It was like a sign that read, 'look at me, this is who I am' and nearly everyone just accepted the facade, the lie. Because people tended not to look deeper and DiNozzo was the king of convincing people not to. He came from money, he dresses well... he acts bold and brash and never takes anything seriously. People see the veneer and make judgements and draw conclusions; but they're wrong, completely wrong.

If I'm really honest I _was_ one of those people for a while. I saw the big obvious things and missed the fine print, the details; the _truth_. That was until I saw him at his most vulnerable; when he got called to a child lying dead on the road. Killed by a suspect fleeing in a stolen SUV, so desperate to avoid punishment he hadn't even stopped when he hit her. It wasn't like he hadn't seen her either; she had hit the windshield.

We hadn't been involved in the chase but we had been called in afterward. The look on Tony's face as he stared down at the corpse, it was an expression I had never seen him wear before. There were no dramatics from him either; no sobbing or punching walls, just this _look_. Maybe the saddest look I've ever seen; a look of understanding so profound I wondered if maybe he'd lost a child himself at some point. I didn't ask him though, I couldn't bring myself to.

He had hunted the child's killer down with a determination that flattened everything in its wake. After it was all over I had found him drinking in a bar, and he was drinking hard liquor too; none of that sweet sugary rubbish most young people seem to love.

Turned out he hadn't had enough money for a cab after he'd paid his bar tab and he sure as hell wasn't getting his keys back so I had been his last hope since he was too far from his apartment to walk. He seemed almost surprised I'd turned up at all when I got there and I understood why; I hadn't exactly been the greatest partner to him up until then. I sat down next to him knowing he needed to talk, he didn't say much in the end but it was enough. He told me that he wanted to kill the guy; that he wanted to beat him to death with his bare hands. He said it with such quiet intensity I'd known he was dead serious and that he had the capacity to actually do it and I had been shocked. Because despite what people say in macho rages, it is a rare thing to meet someone who genuinely has such a capacity. Then, with me still stunned he had laughed and said, 'well you gotta laugh, cos really, that's the alternative.'

Then he had gotten up and walked out towards my car. It took me a minute to follow because even though he hadn't meant me to understand everything he had said to me, I had. I had suddenly understood that the man he was talking about wasn't the guy who had killed that girl at all. No, he was talking about a different man, a man from his past, the man who had broken him so badly in the first place.

So it was then I started to look a little deeper, watch a little more closely and I'm glad I did because it turns out he's brilliant. So good in fact I know he'll be gone soon, yes, he'll leave and go somewhere he truly appreciated. Somewhere that people understand that he is brilliant, somewhere that they'll understand _him_; at least as much as any man could.

That is of course if he survives. Because the man pointing the pistol at him _wants_ to kill him, _wants_ to watch him die and the only thing stopping him is that if he takes that shot he'll be dead too. With one trigger comes two deaths. Because there is a gun pointed at his head too, a lot of them in fact.

Because he was in the middle of the precinct. Because when Tony had well and truly _had _the guy he had been walking out the station. The man had decided it wasn't fun to taunt the police anymore when Tony had started to _get to him_ in a way he knew he couldn't pull back from. So since he wasn't under arrest he decided to leave. Tony had followed and had finally yelled the words that had got him to snap and confess something he shouldn't have known. He had known it was over the second the words had left his mouth; that everything had fallen apart. So he had done something no-one had seen coming; he'd pulled a gun from a uniformed officer who was standing behind him totally oblivious and slammed it into Tony's head. He had then wrapped his forearm round Tony's neck and used him as both a shield and a hostage.

And so here we are; me a just few feet away, gun in hand and yet completely useless.

"You just couldn't let it go could you?" the guy fumes. "Well look where it's got you now, asshole."

"Guess I could say the same to you." Tony replies glibly.

"Do you have to antagonise the guy with the gun Tony?" I say exasperated, trying to get him to shut up. I can feel sweat dripping down my back unpleasantly as my mind starts running horrible scenarios that I hope to God won't come true.

"Well he started it." Tony says petulantly but with a wide smile. What the hell is he playing at?

"I have a _gun_ to your head, you idiot. So how bout you beg me for your life now?" No response. "Beg me, now!"

"Fuck you." He replies voice as hard as steel before he reverts back to a light tone again, "So, here's what's gonna happen, I'm gonna give you three seconds to put down your gun."

As he's saying it he subtly waves his right hand at me and then hold out two fingers clearly to me.

"Is that clear he says; _three_ seconds," Tony's words are meant for me and he flashes his message at me again to be sure; 'TWO seconds'. I give him a subtle nod so he knows I understand. "One. Two."

And bang, Tony goes limp throwing the gunman off enough that he lets go and the moment he does I put a bullet in his head. It's all over in a matter of seconds and guys dead before he hits the floor.

Tony just stands up; blood running down his face from being pistol whipped, and walks out of the building. No reaction on his face at all. The whole precinct seems to be in shock; like they can't believe that just happened in their own house. I hand my gun to the nearest cop and follow him out. I find him sitting on the steps outside the precinct.

"Tony?" I say putting a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay?"

He smiles, "Well, my heads looked prettier but yeah, I'm fine."

"Bullshitting as always, eh Tony?" I say returning the smile.

"Maybe." He says with a laugh, then he looks at me and says seriously, "How about you, are you okay?"

"Me?"

"Come on, man. You just shot a man dead and we both know you hate that you had to do that. I'm sorry Ray."

"Don't you apologise," I say my voice rising, "The guy was going to _kill you_! Don't you think for one second I regret what I did, d'you hear me!"

Tony looks away from me. "I made a decision that meant you had no choice. I could have let someone at least try to talk him down."

"No-one could have talked him down. He was likely going to get the needle for what he did and he knew it. I could see him getting ready to die and he was going to take you with him. So no; _he_ made the decision not you."

Tony says nothing in reply. Instead he shifts topics. "So, uh, Ray I need to tell you something, I made a decision..."

"You're leaving, right?" I say knowingly. Tony looks shocked but quickly covers it with a smile.

"Yeah," he replies quietly, "It's not because of you though, you know that right. You're the best partner I've ever had."

"I know; I am an incredible partner." I say cockily as though I am thinking wistfully of my own excellence. Joking is the DiNozzo default reaction so I might as well join in. I can see the appreciation at my acceptance all over his face. "Promise me you'll keep in touch."

"Of course." he says with that beaming smile of his.

Then he gets up and walks away and this time, this time I don't follow.


End file.
